I'm up.

It's 4:10 am. I just woke up. Some would say, "why get up that early?" Well its like 1 in the afternoon for me.
I got home at 10am and clicked around on the computer for a while then went to sleep at 11am. ("Just a nap" I told myself) My bro wakes me up around 8:30 pm so I get up and talk to him some. (I was having some dream about worknig for some medical research company or something)
Then after an hour I figured I would do something constructive, but then laid back down. 6 1/2 hours later, I wake up. I had some dream about having a truck and a sports car, and I was with friends at some event and had parked in some biug parking deck. My friend had a sports car but it was kinda crappy. I road with him through this tunnel and he wanted to be all stupid and try to jump these big holes carved into the road in a lane that had been closed off for construction. It wasn't my car so I didn't care. He made it, but messed up his transmission pretty bad and the underside of his car. I had to laugh.

Remember how I said I discovered a baby fish...well there is a whole family of them now and it looks like some of the adult fish are still in the spawning mood. (And here I thought they where just playing tag) (They were playing "tag" alright..."tag that ass")

I had a few things planned for the day, but ended up sleeping through them all. Its ok though. Nothing important is planned until Thursday. For now, I need to through on a shirt and head to W*l-M*rt to get some distiled water and more fish food.

I'm a Ninja!

John walked in today and walked to his room while he was on his phone. He was talking with his back half turned to me and noticed his mail. I took this opportunity to ninja my way over to his side and stand there silently. After talking for about 3 more minutes, he finaly turned to leave and nearly shit himself when he saw me right beside him. Healmost dropped everything in his hands including thr cell phone but managed to cradle it all to his chest before it could all fall to the ground. It was definatly worth it to see the look on his face.

New addition to my tank

I noticed something odd in my fish tank today. Something small. Upon closer inspection I discoverd that it was a baby fish. It was a completely unexpected surprise, but also kinda sad to know that my goldfish get more action than I do.

Structure? Who needs it.

A.K.A. Freeform

I don't know what I'm about to say. I just want to talk. You ever just want to talk? Sure you do. You don't know what you want to talk about. You just want to talk to somebody thats willing to listen. Its like taking a jog...not really, but it helps. You get get more than words off your chest. The words are just a conduit to carry the built up stress and emotions that have been growing inside of you. Sometimes you don't really have anything to say, but then again, that doesn't really matter because sometimes talking to someone isn't for their benefit, its for yours. It enables friends or even total strangers, to empathicly share the load that is on your shoulders. They don't mind carrying a little bit of the story of your life that you are willing to break off and disperse out to them because to them, the load is never quite as heavy as it was to you. Think back to all the times you have talked to someone about absolutely nothing , but the conversation lasted for hours. Its the link that matters, not the wether the story is actually going anywhere any time soon.
At the same time, being willing to listen to someone that has nothing to talk about is important. You never know what the person is going to have to say. They may be happy, they may be bored, they may just be venting...and forget to tell you thay they are venting.

I miss listening.
I miss talking.

I talk my fair share, but...

well...

I want to talk like I used to...

and listen again.

We all fall down

The way I see it, low levels of controled self destructive activity can be benificial. I mean, you might as well get it out of your system while you are thinking rationaly than sometime down the road at any given moment, doing someting you would regret later.

Don't take this the wrong way. There are many different level of self destructive behavior. I'm talking about the kindergaden stuff like cheating on your diet and the like.

Inside all of us is a little child that doesn't know any better, and from time to time that child sneaks into the control room and runs amuck pressing all the shiny buttons in our mind, making do things even though we know better. You can either keep that child distracted when you know you won't be able to keep your eyes on the little bugger the whole time, or you can scold the little fella and run the risk of the kid never coming back out to play.
The child inside of us isn't like a normal, physical child. It can be controled about as much as a huge river can. Sure you can restrict its flow, but you still gotta let out the pressure from time to time or else the whole thing will go out of control.

Let some of the pressure out. Let your inner kid run around a little, before you forget how.

movie night

I hadn't gone to the theater in a while so I caught a movie today then hung around for 2 more before I left. It was worth the ticket.

So there!

I figured out why I've been so pissy as of late... but I'm not telling you why so piss off about it.

Fish

You know, I cleaned my tank, got a few extra fish. They're swimmin around all happy, and that makes me smile. It makes me smile because they could give 2 damns about the world as long as they get a little food every now and then. Sometimes you want to be oblivious, but its too late because you know too much. Just swimmin around, playing tag, all happy. The snail is just doing his thing, keeping things tidy. The older fish, he kinda feels segrigated since he is bigger, a lot bigger, so he just kinda does his own thing while the little ones dart by playing tag. I swear I just saw my snail burp. That was kinda cool.

Everyone gets to that point eventually. They just want to say to hell with that whole outside world thing. Just let me get a little food every now and then and I'll be happy. The trick is pressing on and getting through the funk, but sometimes its not a funk. Some of the greatest poets and playwrites did that, and they went on to create some of the greatest things ever, but no one knew until after they were dead because they just didn't want to deal with "people."
Sometimes, I think that if I became instantly wealthy like winning the lottery or something, I would probably never talk to anyone again. I would just hide myself away somewhere and just let the world wash by, but then again, I would like to be in a relationship, and friends are fun to have from time to time.

My snail just hiccuped...That was kinda funny.

Happy T-day

Happy T-day

Murgle Murgle

Wow, its kinda cold.

I finally did some cleaning on my aquarium and the little buggers are thankful. Jebus!, its getting cold, warm, colder, warm, colder, and working at night, I really get to feel it.

Krys-TaL (only spelled differently...um and pronounced differently too)

Meet my new friend. Acquainted through Joe and Angie.

She definately is a welcome addition to the circle of friends. She can even bowl... and bowl well at that.
It's like when they add a new character to your favorite TV show in season 3 and it starts a whole new angle of zainy plot twists and one liners. All we need now is a flaming homosexu... oh yeah...Barry's contract got axed back in season 2.

I guess we can just fill in that spot with a dog or something.

Blah

Eventually, you get into that blah mood were you want to talk about stuff but you just don't want to take the time to manifest the stuff into words. Oh yeah. My Fish is probably pissed at me. I've been waiting on John to move a table out of his room form me to put in mine, and I was going to put my fish tank on it so in preparation, I haven't cleaned it yet so now it is past due for a cleaning and its getting a little murky. Livable, but still....ew.

Bowling

Today was pretty fun. I hung out with some friends of mineWe had a Waffle House breakfast and did some bowling. I would say more but I really need to get some sleep.

I got Banned!!!

Okay, so I had been botting in Warcraft. I got caught. They banned me. No more Warcraft. Now i get to have a life again.

but, the cat came back....

We all know the song, and damn if it wasn't true. 2 weeks of peace then... that damn cat comes back. John's other cat, DeeDee, was pissed. She feels the same way I do about Baby.

Finally

I had my Birthday party and got smashed on Vodka & OJ, got promoted (kinda) at work (its more money), got a new computer, washed my cell phone, lost weight, gained some back, starting on losing it again, all my fish died except for "The Pimp" and "Flash" the Snail, started down the painfull road of paying off all of my old credit card debt, celebrated the fact that my roommate's cat,"Baby" um...."ran away"and got banned from world of Warcraft and as such will probably not play any more (at least for a long time.)
Well... now that that is all over with, I can get back to my life...and blog more often.

Have a nice day.