From Andy's World

20XX

2011-02-01T12:43:00.003-05:00

2012. The year everything is supposed to end!... or begin, or start over or something. No one really knows what is supposed to happen, but there sure are plenty of theories. Some say the magnetic poles will flip, causing the magnetic field around the Earth to weaken and allow the sun to bombard us with radiation. Some say that a mysterious rogue planet will enter our solar system and aliens will hop off of it and take over our world. Some say that the Earth will cross through the galactic center of the Milky Way and cosmic radiation from the great black hole in the center of the galaxy will reprogram our DNA and cause a spontaneous evolution. Then again, some say nothing will happen. In the end, does it really matter? All of these things seem so beyond our realm of control that should there even be a reason to worry about them? Then again, is 2012 really just the next Y2K? all hype and hope? Planet X survival kits and tin foil...er anti-radiation lining for your house? I'm sure plenty of imaginative "kits" will become available to anyone willing to spend their money on them when 2012 rolls around, but don't let the crazy talk get to you... but then again, a few boxes of tin foil and a roll of duct tape can always come in handy.

Wow! Hey you!

2010-06-25T13:35:00.001-04:00

Soooo... I stumbled across this blogger website and had forgotten that I had a blog here. It's been quite some time since my last post. I'm sure no one reads this stuff anyway. I have a lot of interesting changes going on or have already happened in my life. If I remember to, I'll post updates soon.

Sigh

2008-08-03T19:21:00.004-04:00

I know. I haven't posted in forever. I started posting blogs on myspace. I've been on a diet and I'm losing a good amount of weight. I really wish Denise would talk to to me more. I know she lives 3 hours away and long distance relationships are hard, but I'd rather have a hard relationship than none at all.

I'm saving up myu money to get a touring moped. Its really nice. It can do 80 mph and get 60 mpg.

Ok. I'm going to sleep now.

Chronicles: Remembering Myself (5)

2008-01-27T19:16:00.000-05:00

I walk the tattered landscape that I once called home. "Home" how could I have been so foolish? I walk away from it in disgrace as my head hangs down, more so in disbelief than anything else. Who had I become? How could I have lost myself so easily? I kick at a root in the dirt only to be rewarded with a stubbed toe. Whatever I had kicked was no root. It was too hard to be that. I knelt down and dug my fingers into the earth. Working my fingers around the base of the object, it soon became apparent. "My old sword." The great weapon of might that helped me along my path so long ago. Now it is old and rusted. Its inlaid markings all filled with dirt and mold. A shadow of itself, much like I had become. I knew my shield could not be far away. A few feet away, I found my shield. I had become the base of an old gnarled weed, the roots twisting around it like a prison. I began to pull at the weed the the thorns were sharp and unexpected. The small stinging pain in my fingers threw me for I had forgotten what pain was like. It angered me. Looking at my old rusted sword, I raised it up and slashed at the weeds in anger. Once, twice, three times I swung at them, until finally after the third strike, a memory flashed through my mind. The sword, the shield, my quest. It all came back to me at that moment. These were not tools of war. These were a part of me. They were my very appendages, only forgotten for so long. The forth strike met its mark and cleaved the gnarled weeds clean from my shield. I picked it up, shook the earth from it, and placed it in it rightful place on my arm. It was now a part of me again, and I then began to remember who I was and why my fight was not over yet.

Chronicles Lost: The Hunt (2)

2008-01-27T18:23:00.000-05:00

"Choose someone."

The idea disgusted Nell as all men were alike. None of them appreciated her for who she really was. They just saw her as a prize to win and then show off. She had to clear her mind of all of this stress and the only way to do that was to sneak out of the castle and go hunting. Not killing or for game. She hunted to observe, and to try to outwit those she pursued, both human and beast. There had been tale of a foul beast, hidden amongst the woods that dared to kill any man who unfortunate enough to draw too near to it's clutches. The idea excited her and had decided to make this her last great adventure before giving into her parents wishes.

Chronicles Lost: The Princess (1)

2008-01-27T14:13:00.000-05:00

Once upon a time, there was this beautiful princess. Amazing as she was, she did not feel that she belonged in her world of fancy lace and awkward dinner parties. The King and Queen kind and patient, very patient actually. They hoped she would one day grow out of this phase of hers and accept her royal duties as princess and one day as Queen. As they ears drifted by, the royal family continued to love their dear Nell as much as parents should love their children, but began to grow impatient. They began inviting a number of eligible Princes to their parties in hopes that one would catch her eye, but the idea bored her. All the Princes thought alike, acted alike, and all wanted the same thing. They wanted her as a trophy, not as a wife or a person to love. She was just a prize to them. Time passed and the princess got older and though unbecoming of a princess, be became more independent. Her parents were getting older, too and didn't want to leave things to chance. The thought of a princess becoming an old maid was unheard of. They loved her but grew impatient. One day, they told her that before her next birthday, she must choose. She protested and tried to explain how that was unfair to which her parents replied, " My darling Nell, you are almost thirty! Most princesses marry before they are even twenty. We love you so much, even we won't be around forever. Please dear, for us, choose someone."

Chronicles: The Awakening (4)

2008-01-25T20:01:00.000-05:00

Arrows...
the sounds of battle.
My chest is heavy...
A light flashes before me as I am struck to the ground.
There now stands an angel of such beauty hovering above me.
Where is my heart?
It is so cold.

My eyes open as I gasp for air. The room is still. I lay there in cold sweat. My thick warm blankets and silken sheets are strewn about and kicked on the floor. The one's still wrapped around me are like pythons, heavy with sweat and worked around every limb as if to consume me.

My heart is racing. The only words that can manifest in my lungs are, "I remember."

How long has it been? Years? I can't tell. It has all listed lazily like some dream. Only now do I realize the trap that I was in.

I can see it so vividly now. The day of my so called victory. Standing there with my newly won kingdom before me. I thought the darkness looming on the horizon was the sunset. I should have never let my guard down. The second my sword and shield fell from my grasp, I had doomed myself. Accepting a lie that would keep me from knowing the light of day for all this time.

My sword? Where is my sword? No wait. I must be careful not to cause alarm. These walls. This whole kingdom has eyes. How could I have been so foolish?

I stand up from my bed. So soft and pleasing, I see it now to be only a granite slab. The cold sucking the core of my warmth down into the earth. My sheets of silk and think blankets are gone. There are only the torn rags of enemies long dead.
I am no king. I am a fool. Cold and weak with complacency.

Where is my sword!?

It looks so tiny from here.

2007-09-19T08:57:00.000-04:00

Some of you would assume that my lack of posts would be a sign that I have fallen off the edge of the earth. That assumption would be correct. This post was sent by courrier pidgeon and when I get back to earth, I will resume posting.

Thank you.

Down the straight and narrow (highway)

2007-08-17T17:10:00.000-04:00

Tuesday morning, after work, I'm going to head down to S. Ga to meet up with friends and party that night. Everyone is lookinh forward to it.

Who saw that one coming? (I did! I did!)

2007-08-16T11:31:00.000-04:00

Yeah, I got burned. We all saw it coming. Then again, everyone needs a few "Leroy Jenkins" moments in their life.

I learned what I needed from it.

A four letter word for irrational.

2007-07-21T16:55:00.000-04:00

It wicks its way through my veins. Seeping into the far reaches of my being. Lashing out like a deranged virus, infusing every cell of my body until nothing is left untouched. My Core... My very being is altered. A madness now takes me.

It cannot be measured in time because every moment becomes an eternity wraped within itself.

My mind bends. Warped by the weight of my thoughts. The strain continues into my sleep.

There is no rest from this.

My body sleeps but my mind cannot let go. It wants to scream inside. It wants to be irrational. It wants to hurl itself blindly forward in hopes of breaking through this void that grows within it.

I cannot...

I cannot .....say... the words....

The words.....

Do I feel ... love?

Am I within .... it?

Is this torment that holds my mouth closed yet sets my mind a little too free, that feeling?

The thought of it scares me.

I stand scared... trembling, I stand... scared....but hopeful.

The past says I will fail, as does a thousand voices in my head that lash out and attempt to silence the one....the one.......

the one shred of a voice that dares to say I won't and that its real.

If only it was real.
If only there was even a chance.
I had it ....once.... that chance. Just the one. It was so perfect of a moment. It would have changed my life forever.

I regret having turned it down. Not completly, mind you, but there is still regret. I regret few things. So few few things..

I want to call it love, but I feel much like it the same as picking a name for a new puppy. Its the most beautiful, warm little bundle of joy in the world and the name is irrelevant, really. It just gives a label to the happiness.
Happiness... I am in happiness.... yes.
Happiness is more forgiving when it leaves you.
I'll just think of it as a free trial size version of love. If I don't commit, I can still keep what I've got.
Here I am babbling about nothing. Confused and melodramatic in my words...*sigh*
You win. Its love.

Stupid stupid love.

Clouds pass us by

2007-06-22T19:17:00.000-04:00

I sit upon a spring's spun web, amass a field of green. I gaze longingly out towards the sky. Its gently breeze caressess my cheek. I like to feel it misses me too.
The blades of grass are cool to the touch. The mornings dew having not yet fully evaporated from their bases. Funny that they really sleep during the day and awaken to grow at night.
I watch them grow. From my perch, I see the world. The world I call the world. A world my own, but I can not reach all of it. Sometimes it is too much for me, but I still call it mine.
The breeze playfully kicks at my swing of silk and thread, bringing me back somewhat to the moment but then I slip away. Back to my dreams. Away from this place to which I am bound.

I am alone. For what may seem like certain doom to some may mean a chance at truly living for others. A chance at living for me. I accept this in silence. I have only my memories to converse with, now. The sky is so beautiful today. Come. Watch the sky with me.

A night out, cut short

2007-06-11T20:20:00.000-04:00

I was going to watch a movie tonight at the theater but when I got there it was blocked off by what looked like all of the the Cobb Co. PD. They were all walking around with pistols and rifles drawn tring to find a guy that had attacked the Brinks truck while it was picking up the cash for the day. A news crew had just gotten on the scene and ofcourse all the rednecks in the parking lot had to get their face in the background while they werre interviewing a woman that saw what had transpired. In a nutshell, the Brinks guy had the moneybag and a guy ran up and attacked him. The poor security guard got the crap beat out of him but held the guy off just long enough for the attacker to realize that he had been spotted by onlookers so he fled before the cops could get on the scene. They don't know if he ran inside and hid of went out a back door so they sealed off the building and began searching everyone inside and began doing searches outside incase he was trying to blend in with the crowd. I left before anything else happened.

I got home then decided to go to the gas station just near my house and as I pulled in, I saw several cars of the Kennesaw PD with lights-a-flashing at the gas station beside the one I was pulling into.
I guess today was just a day for stupid people to do stupid things.
Since I didn't get to watch my movie, I decided to get some beer and surf the internet. HURRAY for beer.

Yes and No

2007-06-11T17:44:00.000-04:00

There was no actual date last night. She got off of work later than she had planned so instead, we just talked on the phone for about an hour. She doesn't live nearby so a certain amount of pre-planning has to be used when getting together. We will be talking to each other during the week and will probably do something next week.

a twist

2007-06-10T17:51:00.000-04:00

I'm going out on a date tonight with someone I met last night. She was a customer that came into the store I was working at during the middle of the night. We just started talking and ended up chatting for 3 hours and then decided that the conversation should be continued somewhere in which we could sit and talk and I didn't have to stop every few minutes to ring up customers.

I've lost my appetite.

2007-06-09T15:17:00.000-04:00

It would appear that I have lost my taste for chinese.
Even the best things can turn bitter... from time to time.

Workin' on my fitness

2007-05-29T15:22:00.000-04:00

Thinking about Ivy has given me the motivation I have been needing or almost a year. I've started cleaning up my room again and working out. I'm trying to establish goals and figure out ways to meet them. I'm looking at ways to control my eating habits and spending habits. You could almost say I'm starting to grow up and act my age....almost. I just have to be able to pick myself up by the bootstraps and make a move in the right direction befor history repeats itself.

Fishes

2007-05-29T15:15:00.000-04:00

Well, I am begining to see some baby fish in my tank, again. This will be the third generation. I'm kinda proud that I have been able to keep these fellas alive and happy for so long.

I am a sucker for chinese.

2007-05-25T14:38:00.000-04:00

Today, I caught the early showing of Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End, which was awsome. Afterwards, I left the theater feeling like I needed to do something "EPIC" This brings us to a flashback...
..
..
I have always had a thing for waitresses at chinese reaturants. I don't know why. They just appeal to me. Saving a few choice occasions for another time, we come to the Chinese buffet near my house. I have been going to this particular reasturant for quite some time now. Over a year at the least. Some (well several) months back, they added a new waitress to the staff. Very cute, shy ,just addorable. Oh and the glasses just put it over the top for me. Anyway. I started going there more to see her than because I was particularly hungry. I frequented there so often, actually that they began to have my drink ready for me before I even made it to the table.
I would take my time eating and just enjoy seeing her. nothing creepy. Just being there made me happy. All the while I would never talk to her more than the standard "is everything alright?" to which I would reply "yes" and continue on with my meal. ...
...

Well today I felt "EPIC" so while I had the momentum I decided to do something with it. I went to the restaurant even though I wasn't all that hungry and proceeded to chicken out. I just couldn't bring myself to talk to her. A few minutes went by as I finished my plate of crab rangoons and then it hit me. With the left over puddle of sweet and sour sauce on my plate, I took my fork and began scraping it into small piles and forming them into shapes. twice during this sculpting, she asked if I was done with my plate, to which I replied "No thankyou" with a smile and she went on. It took about 20 minutes of me lightly scraping away on this plate but when I was finished I looked over at her to get her attention and she came to my booth and leaned in a little as if expecting a question, to which I politely asked, "Can you read english well?" It took an extra second for her to understand the question, to which she replied "Yes, I can read english well." and then blushingly beamed a smile as I turned the plate towards her and she read little red letters made out of sweet and sour sauce, spread across my plate that spelled "You are beautiful." We talked for a moment and I actually asked her name. Me, in all my shyness when it comes to dealing with these matters actually asked her name. She told me her name and we talked for just a moment longer before she needed to go help another table. (I've learned there is not much time for chit chat when you work at a chinese reasturant.) We didn't speak after that. I finished my meal went up front to pay and leave. On the way out, she said goodbye to me, which I enjoyed, and then I left. It felt great. It was wonderful that I actually spoke to her, but this momentum of "EPICness" was not over. I couldn't let it end at that so as I was steping off the curb infront of the restaurant, I turned around and steped back inside to grab one of their business cards. I then stopped by the gas station because my tank was empty and grabbed a few gallons and steped inside to grab an instant game lottery ticket. I scratched it off in my car thinking of what I would do with the money if I had actually won anything and what ( or should I say "who") I would spend it on. Well, to my amazment, I actually won a modest yet very generous amount of money from this ticket, and ofcourse I knew what to do with it. I went next door to the flower shop. The little asian lady had just gotten back from a delivery and was unlocking the door when she saw me. She asked if she could help me and I said "Yes. I need help because I am clueless for I am a man." ... She understood...
I breifly explained the situation and gave her the address of the restaurant and name of the person the flowers were to be delivered to. She then asked, "What type of budget are we looking at?" to which I replied simply by reaching into my pocket and pullnig out a modest yet very generopus amount of cash and placing it on the table. Her eyes opened up very much with glee at the sight of the established budget and proceeded to tell me that everything would be taken care of. I picked out a small card, and wrote a few lines from the heart. She placed the card in a small envelope and took over from there. The flowers will be delivered toady at 5:00pm. I won't know the result until the next time I stop by to enjoy some chinese.

Days go by

2007-05-24T18:32:00.000-04:00

The days. The days drip drip drip. Every day a timy drop. A drop from a single icecicle. An icecicle hanging over the side of a frozen bank. The bank attached to the edge of a massive glacier. A glacier that moves so slowly that it doesn't seem to be moving at all but every drip of every day moves it along. Another drop furthers it along. Patient yet unyeilding, it moves. Nothing can stop it. Drip......drip........drip.....

I slowly let this ball unwind

2007-05-17T18:03:00.000-04:00

As I slump within my chair
at the wall I sit and stare
a growing thought develops within my mind

From the places dark and cold
and mememories stale and old
I slowly let this ball unwind.

Along the path of my dealings
with this mass of thought and feelings
I try to discover what presides

Within my brain a growing being
malcontent with what he's seeing
this aborition is not merely along for the ride

It grows within me like a stem
branching out upon its whim
its roots too old to destroy

a culmination of my days
a cataloge of my ways
every act since I was just a boy

Not laid out and organized
and in no way prioritized
just a messy wad of papers within a drawer

and breaks free a list of jots
of old and faded "what if's" and "why not's"
I watch as it swagers down onto the floor

I read the list but feel no pain
why should I with nothing to gain
for feeling bad about events I've left behind

I reminiss
of what Ive missed
and slowly let this ball unwind

Obla de

2007-05-17T17:59:00.000-04:00

Liz.

I know nothing of what she is doing for 9 years and actually did think about her from time to time and when I finally do cross paths with her again, she is getting married 1 month later.
I really wish I could have asked her out on a date atleast once, but thats life.

I ask you

2007-05-09T12:02:00.000-04:00

What does a guy have to do to get a date.

Even less, what does a guy have to do to get a woman to even look at him twice.

Its a losing battle, and its all the jerks of men that don't care about the women they are with that are winning. Bastards.

you call, you win.

2007-05-09T11:20:00.000-04:00

So I'm sitting down in my car from coming out of Publix two nights ago, and when I turn the car on, the radio turns on and the DJ says, "Ok, call and sing 10 seconds of any song you want and you win a playstation SingStar prize pack." (http://www.us.playstation.com/SingStarRocks/)

I figure, why not. So I called and got through, but then the guy said that I was caller 82 and hung up. At that point I realized that I had to be caller 100 since it was Q100 and they do the constests that way and I was caller 82 which kinda stunk, but I was determined to keep calling and after 3 network busy signals and 1 line is busy signal I actually get a ring...ring....ring......ring.......ring........ring..... ring.... I'm thinking to myself now "great I probably over shot and they are just gonna let me hang in ringing limbo until I hang up." Well, I didn't hang up, and after about 15 rings, they finally pick up the line and say "100." I was it! I was the 100th caller! Now all I had to do was sing 10 seconds of any song I wanted but I actually had to REMEMBER enough of the lines of a song to sing tens seconds. My brain was racing and every song that I had ever heard and sang to was turning into empty ghosts as if in some bad dream where you reach out for something and your hand goes right through it. I had to have the lines to SOME song stored on my head SOMEWHERE! I had to sing and I had to sing RIGHT NOW! My heart was racing and my mind was getting fogged more and more as every song I knew slipped away from my memory until I hit one song that I would never ....sigh ....never.....forget. It was in that moment that I began singing midway into "Part of you world" from The Little Mermaid. The Dj and the lady in the studio with him was rolling with laughter. They could not belive I was singing The Little Mermaid. Tem seconds finally came to pass they yelled, "You WIN!"
I was utterly amazed at what had just happened on a whim and now here I am giving them my information for a $320.00 prize package. I picked it up this morning after I got off work and now I have my very own PS2 and SingStar game pack. Yay me.

that's me

2007-05-06T10:10:00.000-04:00

I know I'm not the nicest person anymore.
I used to be all gentlemanly and polite and courtious, but you know, it didn't get me anywhere, so I became a little rude, egotisticle, sexist. I still haven't gained much ground in my social life but at least I feel better about myself. I just have to face it, I'm scary. I scare people. No matter how nice I am our how great I sound on a profile, I'll always be "that creepy guy." I've come to accept that. I've accepted that I scare women enough just by my physical appearance that no matter what I say or do, they will never get past the intial "creepy scary guy" impression that they have of me and it will probably be many more years before I get into a relationship. Now that kinda stinks, but short of winning the lottory and becoming super rich, I see no reason for a woman to want try to see me for who I am as a person instead of what I appear to be. It sucks, but its reality.

starting fresh again, for the first time

2007-05-06T09:05:00.000-04:00

So here I am, sitting with a pint of Ben & Jerry's Strawberry Cheesecake Icecream in one hand and a plastic spork in the other and I think to myself, "Wow. Why have I never eaten this stuff before now?"

It's all part of my starting new things and restarting old ones. I bought some amazingly comfortable rollerskates (not rollerblades)and I use them to go skating once a week. I also bought an electric bass guitar and I am learning how to stum out a few riffs on it as well.
Both are constructive in their own ways.
Its a start.

It sucks but you get what you deserve

2007-03-30T20:47:00.000-04:00

So the other night,at one of the stores I was working at(mind you in a not so....honest area of bufford highway), this lady pulls up in the middle of the night, pumps her gas then leaves her car running at the pump and walks inside. as soon as she gets to the door, someone runs to her car, jumps in and drives off with her car.
She was histerical. she wanted us to call the police, which we did but when she was asked about her car, she didn't know her own plate number. The cops can't really do much without a plate number so she had to call someone else to try to figure out her own plate number which gave the crook a good hour to get away. Downtown Atlanta at Bufford Hwy at 2 AM is NOT the place to leave an unlocked car running with a full tank of gas.

Know a few basic things about yourself and your personal propety, and for goodness sake, if you go somewhere in a shady part of town in the middle of the night, lock your car... better yet, just don't go. Just go home and go somewhere decent in the daylight.

Not all gas is equal

2007-03-30T20:43:00.000-04:00

So today Somebody did something really stupid. The guy delivaring Desil to the store hooked his tank up to The WRONG tank! He hooked his DESIL tank up to our UNLEADED tank. and began dumping desil in. which then ruined our entire resivour of unleaded gas. we had to hit the emergency shutoff bitton and kill all gas sales for the rest of the day until his company could come out to pump out all the bad gas and replace it with clean fuel. I bet he felt like an idiot, but it was kinda funny watching all the confused faces of people as we told them that we didn't have any gas.

3 day Weekend

2007-03-27T21:37:00.000-04:00

Well, I am wrapping up a 3 day weekend, a boy was it great. I haven't had a 3 day weekend in at least 8 months and probably won't have another until vacation time rolls around. It was very needed and well deserved.

Dream from last night

2007-03-06T10:41:00.000-05:00

So I was awaken by these people coming through my window, and they told me I had to go with them now. I didn't mind so much because I knew them, kinda. We got on this train right ourside my window and all road in this boxcar for a long ways until we stopped and all got out in some train yard, construction area. We were told that we had all this stuff we had to build and we had to build it all starting now. Now if you know anything about me, I was all like "Fuck that, and Fuck this." and just straight up told the guy, "No." Everyone else started working and I went inside the office/trailer home to chill because it WAS the middle of the night after all. I got in there and ther was this woman my age. It turned turned out we were in the same predicament. Both of us came here on the train but wanted nothing to do with all this building and working but had no way of getting home because WE STEPPED OUT OF A WINDOW AND ONTO A TRAIN for christ's sake! We talked a little bit and kinda hit it off but then I sat there on the couch and tried to think of a way to get home. I didn't have my cell phone on me so the only number I could remember was my buddy Justin's home phone number but I didn't want to call him at midnight to be all lie, "Hey, can you come pick me up." so I didn't call. I then fell asleep on the couch. (on a side note, it was a tough, cheap green fake leather kinda couch. I think from my past somewhere.) I awoke to the other people coming in the office, so I asked them if they were done in hopes that we would be leaving. They just kinda looked at each other and gave a rugged, tired half laugh and mentioned that there was a lot of other work that needed to be done and things to be built. At that moment, The woman (for name sake, I'll call her Ann) came in from the other room adn was walking out the front door. At that moment I was piking up the phone to call Justin who answered had been dead asleep so he had no clue what the conversation was about but he heard me talking to Ann as she was walking away. I wanted her to stop. I told her that I was getting the 2 of us a ride, but she kept walking at a brisk pace down the short paved walkway to the street saying, "It's not going to work out." to which Justin replies to me over the phone, "It won't work out?" I try to tell her that I got a ride, but a Taxi pulls up to her with 3 other peopl inside and she steps in saying, "I already got a ride." to which Justin replies to me, "You already got a ride...ok." and hangs up the phone, still half asllep and completly oblivious to what just happened. Then she just rides off in the cab.

At this point I kinda slip out of my dream into that zone where you know you are dreaming and can kinda edit what is going on but I just end up kicking myself for not doing something cool like grabbing her up and just *poof*ing back home. I allow myself to slip back into the dream and turn around to see my car park near me, unlocked and with the keys in the front seat. I hop in and "drive off" which turns into me just traveling on foot across some really back woods redneck yards in the middle of nowhere, to back home...(ok it wasn't the middle of nowhere it was Inaha. If you don't know...you just don't know) and there was snow all over the ground, and roots. Big, freaking huge roots coming out of the ground.

I get home and time kinda fast fowards to a party at someone else's house. I am taking some pictures with my digital camera and it happens that Ann is there and I take some pictures of her, too. She had had a few to drink and she walks up to me and asks that I stop taking pictures of her. I look at what pictures I had taken of here and realize that they were rather...incriminating. I say somthing to her and she just starts into why we wouldn't work out together and after the first wave of reasons, she says, "and besides. How hold are you?" to which I reply "27" and she says, "No, really" and I say, "Ya, really. 27" You then flash to an image inside her head where she had formed this list of pros can cons about me and this big number "35" beside a picture of my face, and then you see the number change to "27" and all the cons go away and the pros list doubles. It flashes back to the 2 of us and she suddenly acknowledges that things could work out between us, and agrees to be in a relationship with me.

Now at some point during this conversation we had traveled outside and was standing around a well designed, small, concrete, round table in the yard which was all thick green grass and beside this beautiful, big southern house. There were children inside the house playing in some unused bedroom. 2 boys and 2 girls around the age of 6, drawing of scratch paper and doing kid things to pass the time. There were 2 other people out there at the table with me and Ann. I think it was her mother and a sister or cousin of her's, but anyway, the house suddenly explodes in this huge blazing ball of fire and as the women look at the house, I look up to see these basketball sized meteors screaming down for a firey sky. I look over the the other grand home near us and identify the entrance to the bombshelter/cave that was near the porch. I direct the women to run for the shelter, but the 2 other women want to run inside the house for safety and not in the shelter. I'm not sure what Ann chooses but I think she is following me. I run for the shelter.

I make it to under the porch and then after that everything just sort of goes into slow motion until the whole event stops as if you paused a movie and then I wake up.

I can piece together different events that would have caused most of these scenes to happen in my dream, but still....wow.

Its hard out hear for a cult leader

2007-03-02T11:34:00.000-05:00

OK, Here has been my life since my last post:
- I'm still working nights in Norcross, but I shouldn't be. The only reason why I'm still there is because my boss is really anal and feels I need to be perfect before he puts my on the promotion list. Its has been quite a challenge and I am meeting his goals but now I think he is stallnig because he doesn't want to have to lose a great employee.

- I bought someone flowers for V -day only to here, "Thanks but I'm kinda seeing someone right now, but we can still be friends..." I trailed off after that.

- So I don't sound racist, I won't mention the race of the majority of people that come into my store at night over in the Little Mexico side of Buford Highway, but these are the dirtiest, laziest, stealingest, nastiest, no moral using little bastards that I have ever seen. Some of them are good people, mind you, but the ones that are agree that the rest of them are bringing the whole area to hell.

- I beat the hell out of some random guy. I was mopping the floor and caught him trying to steal cigarettes while he thought I wasn't looking at him so while he wasn't looking at me, I waltzed over there and began using some "Fist Justice" on him. I dragged his ass across that entire store before I finally kicked him out the door and let his broken and bleeding ass run away. I could have called the cops but I had gotten of of the cigarettes off of him and it felt REALLY GOOD to beat the hell out of someone. I still have his jacket in my car as a momento.

- COMPUSA Is closing its doors and moving out of the Atlanta market. That means they are liquidating everything down to the shelves and telling their employyess to find new jobs nexgt month. This is good for good deals, but its bad for me because my roommate works for them.

- I have/had a stalker. Yep a stalker, and it was a dude. His name is Todd. He came straight up to me the other Sunday for the first time and had it in his head that I was the key to his salvation. To him, I was the only person capable of bringing him back to christ and pulling him off his path to damnation. Only my prayers and my giving of THE WORD could save hime and only I could see into his soul to tell him how to fix himself. I had never met Todd before. Todd Creeped me out.
Todd is a little special in the head, and probably needed Meds. He is the kind of person that you hear about in the news that finally snaps one day and does some crazy over-the-top thing. to prove something to the world. I didn't want that thing to involve me. He began showing up several times during my shifts. He kept asking me the same questions over and over in hopes that I would give him the answers to his life and GOD. Now I'm and pretty tough dude and can handle myself well, but people like Todd scare the shit out of me because they don't think rationaly, and sometimes little things like stalking people or killing people gets overlooked by their since of morals. Fianlly, after a few nights of Todd beind my disciple and following me around the store in hopes of recieveing THE WORD, I got a cop to run him off. The next morning he came back. I warned the morning crew to keep and eye on him because he is a creepy dude and watched him talking on his cell phone just outside the front door. Five minutes later my clerk says, "Why is there a fire truck in our parking lot?" I look up and see the fire truck... and the other 2 fire trucks... and the 4 ambulances... and half of the Gwinette county police dept screaming into the parking lot like gangbusters, (all during the morning rush, mind you) and I glance over to see Todd checking to to if I'm looking at him through the window. The fire fighters come in as if someone is on deaths door and exclaim, "Did you call!?!" I look at them, still slightly in shock and say, "Nope." They describe the person in question that the came for, which was Todd to a T and I point stright at him who was then strolling across the parking lot as if nothing was going on. They walked over to him, took him off the the side, talked to him very politely and about 20 minutes later, took him the the hospital in hopes of finding some form of medication for him. All the while there are still around a dozen emergency vehicles in our parking lot with every flashing light they have turned on. They took Todd away and I could finally breath a sigh a relief. By then, my neck was THROBBING with pain form being SO tense during the whole thing, because I had gone into "Bosnia Mode" where I am on high alert for the slightest thing out of the ordinary to happen and I am GONE. I had visions in my head of any form of possible shooting, bombing, or mass disturbanse possible and had formulated plans of escape for each of them. All the while, I'm smiling at the customers and greeting them and ringing up thier stuff as if nothing at all was out of place.Every muscle in my body was more tense than it had been in years, and I only realized how tense it was after the adrenaline started to wear off and pain had set in. It was a tough start to my weakend, but I knew all was better because they caught Todd. Well, Todd still comes around during the morning rush, but I'm guessing he is on meds now because he still says hey to me and ties to come through my line if possible, but he doesn't push the conversation any further. He just buys his coffee and his taquitto and goes about his business... but I still keep my eye on him, just incase he forgets to take his meds and starts looking for salvation again.

Thats my life in a nutshell.

Oh My God

2007-01-20T14:14:00.000-05:00

I just got back from watching Pan's Labyrinth.

All macho crap aside. All sexual innuendoes, puns, one liners, dry humor and the rest aside, this movie is amazing.

I love this movie. I am in love with this movie. This movie is perfect. This movie touched me emotionaly. By the time it was over, I had been taken to places inside myself that I had not been to in a long long time. When the credits rolled, it took me a few minutes to collect myself, because emotionaly, I was transformed into the little girl in the movie. Every frightening twist and turn. So much courage yet such frailty. Oh my god it was an emotional rollercoster. I love it. I want to watch it again and again and again.

Now I will warn you. It is a forgien film. It is Spanish with english subtitles, but the dialog is slow enough that the subtitles are easy to follow and reading the subtitles makes it like you are turning the pages of this gothic fairytale.

Do yourself this favor. Watch it while it is still in theaters... several times.

I will

Go inside the labyrith.

"if you try harder and keep pursuing I will change my mind"

2007-01-12T08:56:00.000-05:00

Okay Mr. Andy I have a question for you... Why is it that when a girl tells a guy that she is not interested they think it means "if you try harder and keep pursuing (or pestering) I will change my mind"? Just for the record this is not how it works... maybe for a week but DEFINETLY not
after a year!

Question submited by: http://www.myspace.com/sonsjoygirl
-------------

What we have stumbled upon here is what I like to call the "Telemarketer" approach. Now mind you, different men have different approaches that they use. Most men know of the different styles available but have their own preference. The telemarketer approach uses the same idea as an actual telemarketer. Telemarketers know that with most weak-minded people, if you can just keep them on the phone and talk to them long enough, either they will agree with whatever you are saying because it seems to start sounding good enough to give it a try, or they will agree with you just to get you off the phone. Either way, they have made the sale. Telemarketers suck and they waste your time, but if you've ever started listening to them, you kinda get sucked in up until then end and hopefully when they throw out the "hook" you have the fortitude to say "no." At this point, they normally hang up.
With men, they have more at stake than just a sale. Remember, men (ok "some" men) are looking for a relationship. They have looked around and they have picked you. For whatever reason, you are the ideal match. Once that has been established, a man's level of rationality goes out of the window.
At this point, once the primary advances have been turned down, it turns into a war of attrition. Using the telemarketer rational, the idea is that if they can keep your attention long enough over a period of weeks, months, and even years, depending of how desireable you are to them, eventualy, you will just give in. Either you will start seeing this person in a different light, or you will give the relationship a try just to get them to stop annoying you.
Amazingly, this technique DOES work. Not always, but enough to keep men's hopes alive in its use.

Want to know more about how men think? Ask me.

The Truth about how men think... from a guys perspective.

2007-01-09T10:08:00.000-05:00

This one goes out to the ladies.This is open, honest and sincere.This is not a chain post or a gag.I am sure you have accumulated atleast one or two questions about men in general ( ok, thousands but who's counting) and why they act the way they do to the people around them including the people they love (namely, you).Men never give an open and honest answer to these types of questions because the person asking the question is normally someone very close to them and the truth would "ruin the way things are" so here is your chance. Think over any of the questions you've ever wanted to know about men (in general) and send it to me.Depending on the number of questions I recieve, every couple of days I will post the question and my answer for the world to see.Now, I warn you. You may not like the answer. The answer may be veiwed as stupid and make no since at all, but remember, my answer is to why men "do" whatever it is you are asking about and sometimes men do things that don't make since.When I post the question and answer, I will give credit of the question to whomever asked it, unless they wish to remain unnamed.If your question does not get answered right away, please give me time as some questions may seem to have a simple answer to you but may be very complicated to explain across the "gender gap."there is no limit to the number of questions you can submit, but only one will be answered at a time.Have fun brain storming.Andy

I've gone too far

2007-01-02T15:59:00.000-05:00

I'm an all or nothing kind of guy.
The problem is that because of this I tend to take things too far, in every aspect of life. All be it, I acknowledge that makes me who I am, but it tends to lead to self control issues. I just figured actually writing that down and throwing it out there might help me come to terms with some issues I have had on the back burner.

Happy Ninja Pirate Fighting Love GO!

2007-01-02T13:05:00.000-05:00

Here is a list of some of the movies I have placed on my "Don't miss for the world" list.

Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End - 5/25/2007

Transformers - 7/4/2007

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix - 7/13/2007

Alien vs. Predator 2 - 12/21/2007

A few honorable mentions that I plan on watching but am not in any hurry are:

Happily N'Ever After - 1/5/2007
Epic Movie - 1/26/2007
Jet Li's Rogue - 2/2/2007
Norbit - 2/9/2007
Ghost Rider - 2/16/2007
Meet the Robinsons - 3/30/2007
Balls of Fury - 4/27/2007
Spider-Man 3 - 5/4/2007
Shrek 3 - 5/18/2007
Ocean's Thirteen - 6/8/2007
Fantastic Four 2 - 6/15/2007
Evan Almighty - 6/22/2007
The Simpsons Movie - 7/27/2007
Fred Claus - 11/9/2007

Spider Man 3 didn't make the top list because I am a dude, and I am not going to act all excited about seeing Toby rip his spiderman outfit off, but he does turn into Venom... which is cool... and besides, he's no Johnny Depp or Orlando Bloom.

The Simpsons Movie is worth watching in Theaters, but I'm in no rush.

There is a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie coming out but its all CGI and looks like it was done by the same people that did Jimmy Newtron for Nickelodeon so "BOOOOOOOOOOOO" I'll be skipping that one.

I scare people

2006-12-29T17:09:00.000-05:00

I really think I do. I don't mean to. Take today for instance. Now mind you, this isn't the first time this has happened...

I was at the movies today. I got there a little early to get a good seat. I got my favorite spot, middle seat, middle row. As it got closer to time for the movie, more people showed up. At first I overlooked as people went on to different rows, but as the room filled up more I stopped to look around and noticed that every row was at least half full or more, except for mine. I was still the only one on my row, which I would consider the best row. People would walk up the stairs and look up at all the crowed rows then look at my empty row then glance at me then look back up at all the crowed rows then look at me then turn around and try to find something along the bottom. ALONG THE BOTTOM! People would rather crane their necks to see the movie than sit near me in an open row! Finally, a guy with his son sat in my row, only because all the other decent rows were full and his son wanted to sit there, and it wasn't until the room was nearly full until other people sat in my row, all of them guys with their kid and the kid picked the row, yet even then, it seemed to the reluctancy of the parents.
Is it that I look scary? Do I scare people away from me?
Do I have some natural replusion to average people?
It wouldn't bother me if it didn't happen every time I go to the movies by myself, but it DOES happen and I find that kinda odd.
It kinda stinks, to know that people naturaly avoid you for no apparent reason.

Well, it does to me.

blarg

2006-12-24T16:02:00.000-05:00

I was gonna post. Really I was. I was gonna post up a fury today. woohoo boy I was. I was steaming mad and ready to vent, but its christmas. I'll vent later.

Merry Christmas.

Look Out! Christmas is right behind you!

2006-12-22T13:11:00.000-05:00

Yes, yes, Christmas.
Sneaking up as we speak. Well, Christmas isn't going to get me! I've gotten all my presents. Every gift for everyone that is getting a gift. That means, no traffic, no crowded parking lots, no crowded stores, no racing to get the last thing on the shelf of any interest what so ever. No long LONG check out lines with people arguing and haggling trying to get a discount and then that one person that tries to pay with a check, but didn't get it ready and is writing all slow and talking on the phone, and then the check isn't working...

I'm glad I don't have to deal with any of that. It feels good to have planned ahead and gotten everything down to the...

Oh crap! I forgot wrapping papper! I gotta go!

So this is christmas

2006-12-17T12:31:00.000-05:00

I have made no plans for christmas.

None.

I haven't bought any gifts, any cards, made plans, called anybody, or seen what anyones else is doing, and oddly enough, that doesn't bother me this year.

I'm going to be working Christmas eve night and christmas night anyway so I guess I'll just save a taquito for Santa incase he swings by.

About me

2006-12-17T08:47:00.000-05:00

You know, I don't really know what people know about me. A friend of mine just recently joined myspace and started out his profile with some interesting things about himself. That inspired me to kinda do the same.
I don't really know where to start so I'll just throw stuff out there. I'm sure more will follow later.

I love Q-tips. I can never NEVER have too many Q-tips. I keep two 500 count boxes on hand in my room and and extra in my trunk.

When it comes to water, I only drink distilled. With one sip, I can tell if water is filtered, distilled, spring, or purified.

I am never organized for more than 7 days. Any level of organization I have reached will fall apart after 1 week.

I like to draw. When I draw characters, I start with the eyes, then the face then the rest of the body.

I've stood 5 feet from an active land mine.

Remember Slobodan Milosevic? I was in his underground bunker.

I love math, but I hate calculas. When dealing with a mathmatical problem, I create this fuzzy 3-dimentional world in my head where logic is present but doesn't really have dominance. I take the problem and kinda throw it into a box, jumble it around in my head, turn it upside down and dump it out. The end result is the answer, and most of the time its right.

I believe that computers do not follow logic. They are sensitive and illogical beings that will act however they please, whenever they please, and computer techs are just smart enough to trick the computer into letting its guard down.

I miss when Saturday mornings were for kids. When you would get up at 6:30 in the morning and watch the last 30 minutes of the Agricultural Weekly news just to make sure you didn't miss one single second of cartoons, then sitting indian style with your bowl of cereal in your lap you would sit there untill 11am when they would switch to The Outdoor South fishing and hunting show, then you would get up, turn the TV off by hand, and actually go play outside.

I doubt that without the Accelerated Reader program, any kid would ever read The Red Badge of Courage.

I love chinese buffet, especially the crab rangoons. If a reasturant does not have good crab rangoons, I will not go there.

If I am given a container of peanuts (salted or dry roasted), I will begin eating them until either all the peanuts are gone or I am ill, whichever comes first.

When leaving my room to go out, I always check for 4 things. Keys, wallet, cell phone, and a since of adventure. If any of those are missing, I will not leave.

I believe there are many levels of dirty when it comes to laundry.

I give more to my friends than myself.

I was silently banned from 4-H.

I am a certified healer.

If you ever want me to wish the most evil of all thoughts upon you, then wake me up by tapping my feet. You'll be luckly not to walk away with a black eye.

My snail has an obsesion with molesting Ernie.

The flower that resides before my door

2006-12-08T15:55:00.000-05:00

The flower that resides before my door.
I planted it with my own hands.
Late in the season, it didn't have much time to grow.
It took what little time it was given and made the most of it.
The cold came, but it stood strong.
Pride supporting its stem.
The cold came, but it stood long.
Defiant too the end.
It stood with a lean then a droop then a lay.
It held on to to every last moment yet defiant every day.

Its heart began to slow as the cold took over like a cancer.
You could see it begin to accept, not death, but another, slower, drained, weaker, quieter leg of the journey.
One spent mostly on the sidelines.
Watching as the the other plants turn brown and wither, and dry, and bid farewell to the season that they so enjoyed, but this flower didn't have the time to enjoy the season.
This flower spent every moment of everyday striving to be the best and the brightest and the tallest and the most noteable flower that it could be, and what did that accomplish in the end?
Plucked out of the garden, roots and all.
Cast aside into the grass to die alone and unremembered.
A weed in the eyes to the one that did it such injustice.

Why?

Because it put its heart out for the world to see and had faith.
Blind faith.
Faith in people doing the right thing.
but not all people do what you belive to be right.
Sometimes they just don't know better.
Sometimes, they think they are doing the right thing.
Sometimes, they mistake you for a weed, judging you without the slightest option to defend yourself.

Cold, alone, and dying in the night.
Lost and without hope, I discover my flower laying in the grass just inches from my garden.
I opened my heart to it just as I opened back up the earth from which it was torn, and placed it gently back where it deserved to be within my garden and within my soul.

It is my child.
It was my child from the day I picked it up and chose it to be a part of my life.
The love I have for it is so different. So unique... yet .... detached.
It lies there now in my garden, counting the days until its end.
It doesn't even look at me anymore when I step outside.
It just stares at the ground, because that is all it has the energy to do.
Everyday, giving in to the cancer of winter just a little more until that last shred of hope flickers out and it awates the end,because the end will bring peace, and take the cold away.
I am little more than a lucent memory to my flower these days, though it holds strong in my thoughts.
When I look upon it, I do not see the form that it is now, broken and tired of life.
When I think back upon it, I see the tall, proud, bright and beautiful flower that it fought so hard to be in such little time.
No one really ever noticed this one flower... except for me.
I noticed.

I noticed, because I loved it.
I loved it then and I love it now.
It will always be the most beautiful flower I have ever seen, and after it is gone, it will still bring a smile to my heart.

With a weight tied to each step I take, and a sigh in my breath, I know what it wants from me.
I know it is not happy anymore.
The life and joy drained from it so long ago that to try to conjure the memory only hurts more.
There is little energy for pride these days, but with what little it has left, it looks at me, and with feelings more powerful than any words could convey, we both know its time to let go.

I go inside and retrieve the blade.

I come back outside my front door and take a moment to reflect.

Ever so gently running my fingers along its stem, I think back to its days of beauty and strength, when nothing in the world could stop it.
My fingers reach the base of the stem, and wrap around the bottom for support.
I need support.
I need support but I can't say it. Not now.
I know I have to be the strong one, but its hard.
Its hard but I won't let it show.

A lump in the throat, and a brief race of the heart as the blade takes control!

A sigh is all that escapes the silence...

The long, cold silence.

I step back inside as the cold becomes too much to bare.

cold feet

2006-12-08T14:36:00.000-05:00

My feet are cold. I hate when my feet are cold. There are a few things I will admit to not being able to stand to the point of stoping whatever it is I am doing until the issue is resolved and one of those things is my feet being cold. Having that been said, I'll be right back.

I'm up.

2006-11-30T04:10:00.000-05:00

It's 4:10 am. I just woke up. Some would say, "why get up that early?" Well its like 1 in the afternoon for me.
I got home at 10am and clicked around on the computer for a while then went to sleep at 11am. ("Just a nap" I told myself) My bro wakes me up around 8:30 pm so I get up and talk to him some. (I was having some dream about worknig for some medical research company or something)
Then after an hour I figured I would do something constructive, but then laid back down. 6 1/2 hours later, I wake up. I had some dream about having a truck and a sports car, and I was with friends at some event and had parked in some biug parking deck. My friend had a sports car but it was kinda crappy. I road with him through this tunnel and he wanted to be all stupid and try to jump these big holes carved into the road in a lane that had been closed off for construction. It wasn't my car so I didn't care. He made it, but messed up his transmission pretty bad and the underside of his car. I had to laugh.

Remember how I said I discovered a baby fish...well there is a whole family of them now and it looks like some of the adult fish are still in the spawning mood. (And here I thought they where just playing tag) (They were playing "tag" alright..."tag that ass")

I had a few things planned for the day, but ended up sleeping through them all. Its ok though. Nothing important is planned until Thursday. For now, I need to through on a shirt and head to W*l-M*rt to get some distiled water and more fish food.

I'm a Ninja!

2006-11-28T13:44:00.000-05:00

John walked in today and walked to his room while he was on his phone. He was talking with his back half turned to me and noticed his mail. I took this opportunity to ninja my way over to his side and stand there silently. After talking for about 3 more minutes, he finaly turned to leave and nearly shit himself when he saw me right beside him. Healmost dropped everything in his hands including thr cell phone but managed to cradle it all to his chest before it could all fall to the ground. It was definatly worth it to see the look on his face.

New addition to my tank

2006-11-28T13:39:00.000-05:00

I noticed something odd in my fish tank today. Something small. Upon closer inspection I discoverd that it was a baby fish. It was a completely unexpected surprise, but also kinda sad to know that my goldfish get more action than I do.

Structure? Who needs it.

2006-11-26T17:14:00.000-05:00

A.K.A. Freeform

I don't know what I'm about to say. I just want to talk. You ever just want to talk? Sure you do. You don't know what you want to talk about. You just want to talk to somebody thats willing to listen. Its like taking a jog...not really, but it helps. You get get more than words off your chest. The words are just a conduit to carry the built up stress and emotions that have been growing inside of you. Sometimes you don't really have anything to say, but then again, that doesn't really matter because sometimes talking to someone isn't for their benefit, its for yours. It enables friends or even total strangers, to empathicly share the load that is on your shoulders. They don't mind carrying a little bit of the story of your life that you are willing to break off and disperse out to them because to them, the load is never quite as heavy as it was to you. Think back to all the times you have talked to someone about absolutely nothing , but the conversation lasted for hours. Its the link that matters, not the wether the story is actually going anywhere any time soon.
At the same time, being willing to listen to someone that has nothing to talk about is important. You never know what the person is going to have to say. They may be happy, they may be bored, they may just be venting...and forget to tell you thay they are venting.

I miss listening.
I miss talking.

I talk my fair share, but...

well...

I want to talk like I used to...

and listen again.

We all fall down

2006-11-25T16:35:00.000-05:00

The way I see it, low levels of controled self destructive activity can be benificial. I mean, you might as well get it out of your system while you are thinking rationaly than sometime down the road at any given moment, doing someting you would regret later.

Don't take this the wrong way. There are many different level of self destructive behavior. I'm talking about the kindergaden stuff like cheating on your diet and the like.

Inside all of us is a little child that doesn't know any better, and from time to time that child sneaks into the control room and runs amuck pressing all the shiny buttons in our mind, making do things even though we know better. You can either keep that child distracted when you know you won't be able to keep your eyes on the little bugger the whole time, or you can scold the little fella and run the risk of the kid never coming back out to play.
The child inside of us isn't like a normal, physical child. It can be controled about as much as a huge river can. Sure you can restrict its flow, but you still gotta let out the pressure from time to time or else the whole thing will go out of control.

Let some of the pressure out. Let your inner kid run around a little, before you forget how.

movie night

2006-11-24T18:16:00.000-05:00

I hadn't gone to the theater in a while so I caught a movie today then hung around for 2 more before I left. It was worth the ticket.

So there!

2006-11-24T18:15:00.000-05:00

I figured out why I've been so pissy as of late... but I'm not telling you why so piss off about it.

Fish

2006-11-23T18:27:00.000-05:00

You know, I cleaned my tank, got a few extra fish. They're swimmin around all happy, and that makes me smile. It makes me smile because they could give 2 damns about the world as long as they get a little food every now and then. Sometimes you want to be oblivious, but its too late because you know too much. Just swimmin around, playing tag, all happy. The snail is just doing his thing, keeping things tidy. The older fish, he kinda feels segrigated since he is bigger, a lot bigger, so he just kinda does his own thing while the little ones dart by playing tag. I swear I just saw my snail burp. That was kinda cool.

Everyone gets to that point eventually. They just want to say to hell with that whole outside world thing. Just let me get a little food every now and then and I'll be happy. The trick is pressing on and getting through the funk, but sometimes its not a funk. Some of the greatest poets and playwrites did that, and they went on to create some of the greatest things ever, but no one knew until after they were dead because they just didn't want to deal with "people."
Sometimes, I think that if I became instantly wealthy like winning the lottery or something, I would probably never talk to anyone again. I would just hide myself away somewhere and just let the world wash by, but then again, I would like to be in a relationship, and friends are fun to have from time to time.

My snail just hiccuped...That was kinda funny.

Happy T-day

2006-11-23T08:52:00.000-05:00

Happy T-day

Murgle Murgle

Wow, its kinda cold.

2006-11-21T09:36:00.000-05:00

I finally did some cleaning on my aquarium and the little buggers are thankful. Jebus!, its getting cold, warm, colder, warm, colder, and working at night, I really get to feel it.

Krys-TaL (only spelled differently...um and pronounced differently too)

2006-11-20T17:05:00.000-05:00

Meet my new friend. Acquainted through Joe and Angie.

She definately is a welcome addition to the circle of friends. She can even bowl... and bowl well at that.
It's like when they add a new character to your favorite TV show in season 3 and it starts a whole new angle of zainy plot twists and one liners. All we need now is a flaming homosexu... oh yeah...Barry's contract got axed back in season 2.

I guess we can just fill in that spot with a dog or something.

Blah

2006-11-20T16:59:00.000-05:00

Eventually, you get into that blah mood were you want to talk about stuff but you just don't want to take the time to manifest the stuff into words. Oh yeah. My Fish is probably pissed at me. I've been waiting on John to move a table out of his room form me to put in mine, and I was going to put my fish tank on it so in preparation, I haven't cleaned it yet so now it is past due for a cleaning and its getting a little murky. Livable, but still....ew.

Bowling

2006-11-19T18:14:00.000-05:00

Today was pretty fun. I hung out with some friends of mineWe had a Waffle House breakfast and did some bowling. I would say more but I really need to get some sleep.

I got Banned!!!

2006-11-16T15:49:00.000-05:00

Okay, so I had been botting in Warcraft. I got caught. They banned me. No more Warcraft. Now i get to have a life again.

but, the cat came back....

2006-11-16T10:21:00.000-05:00

We all know the song, and damn if it wasn't true. 2 weeks of peace then... that damn cat comes back. John's other cat, DeeDee, was pissed. She feels the same way I do about Baby.

Finally

2006-11-15T10:53:00.000-05:00

I had my Birthday party and got smashed on Vodka & OJ, got promoted (kinda) at work (its more money), got a new computer, washed my cell phone, lost weight, gained some back, starting on losing it again, all my fish died except for "The Pimp" and "Flash" the Snail, started down the painfull road of paying off all of my old credit card debt, celebrated the fact that my roommate's cat,"Baby" um...."ran away"and got banned from world of Warcraft and as such will probably not play any more (at least for a long time.)
Well... now that that is all over with, I can get back to my life...and blog more often.

Have a nice day.

It's been a while.

2006-10-26T14:00:00.000-04:00

Its been a while. I've been busy. I'll post something later.

Its a good day.

2006-10-13T10:06:00.000-04:00

I'm awake, I'm healthy, I have money...well, some money, I have good friends, my diet is working, my birthday is coming up, lots of friends will be attending, my job is a good one, I get paid well, my family is doing ok, and Kennesaw Mt. is getting easier each week.

New friend

2006-10-11T14:40:00.000-04:00

I was lucky enough to run into Faith the other day. She works in the Herb Shop by the square in Marietta. Meeting her and talking with her has motivated me to stay on my diet which was good timing because I was starting to stray a little. I will be sharing my next crop of kabutcha with her so that she can begin to grow her own. "Kambutch?" you ask? You probably don't want to know.

Going up the mountain

2006-10-06T13:19:00.000-04:00

Kennesaw Mt. has been good to me. I try to go up twice a week now.

over the mountain

2006-09-29T16:48:00.000-04:00

I broke through the pain and made it out feeling amazing. With the weight lifted, I carried on with increased strength and vitallity.

oh god. the pain

2006-09-26T19:47:00.000-04:00

Doubled over in pain, I writhed in my bed all dayon friday. When I did get up and looked in the mirror, I was pale as a ghost. It was as if I had been stabbed in the side. More than likely I'm just passing some minor stones from sometime in the past. With any luck, it should all be over soon.

Chronicles: The Dragon (3)

2006-09-21T12:20:00.000-04:00

I came upon the dragon last night. In the city just before the castle, he sat, looming over the buildings. Many people had come to slay him but they all had failed and fled. I stepped up, sword sheathed and bow drawn, and prepared to confront this beast once and for all. With all the knowledge that I had at my disposal , no matter how skillfully crafted my arrows may have been, once knocked, as if by magic, seemed inadequate and did nothing to the dragon when fired. Shot after shot I took, and the few arrows that actually did make it to the beasts scaly skin, did nothing but amuse the beast as it crouched, almost gloating as it took a swing at other attackers. My arrows were not enough, but I did not want to stand face to face with this beast for in its shear size and strength, it could easily devour me, but I did not run. I backed off and waited. Eventually, it grew tired of being annoyed by so many pointless attackers that it decided to chase them all away or devour any that stayed. I took this as an opportunity. As the many fled from the hulking mass, I gave the appearance of flight as well, only in a different direction. Diving to the ground behind a rising of dirt, I waited for the dragon to continue on after the others, but upon passing me, he stopped. He knew something was wrong... different. A thought was in the air that tasted bitter to his tongue. I had let my thoughts leak out and betray me. It was now or never. With the beasts back still turned to me, I leaped into stride and made haste to its back. Sword drawn and glowing bright white from the force of my will power, I ran up the beast's back without a thought and drove my sword deep into its back. The shock of this caused the dragon to arc his head back in an attempt to snap me in two with his razor sharp teeth and massive jaws, but the angle caused so much pain that he missed, and as I side stepped, I pulled the sword out and drove it in again and again until I began screaming at the beast. Over and over until 50 times I buried my sword into his back and the beast lay slumped over dead.
I had done it. It was my victory.
The war may not have been over yet, but that battle had most assuredly been won, and a major player of the enemy had been taken out of the equation.
Now, I continue on...
forward...
along the path...
to whatever lay ahead.

Chronicles: The Path (2)

2006-09-19T21:43:00.000-04:00

I have walked along the path for a number of days now. Days that are slowly turning over into weeks. Each day the battlements of the enemy grew closer and closer, and with each day they had more time to prepare a strategy for my defeat... but the path had been laid out before me and of all things that must be done, the simplest yet the hardest is to follow that path. Deviate ever so little and all would be lost. I have walked that path each day, and each day that path has seemed narrower and narrower until I was almost walking a tightrope> Strung over a vast precipice that is almost bottomless. Almost. Still deep enough to see the bottom so far below that knowing where it is is harder on the mind than not knowing at all.
Still, I walk the path.
The fight. Oh the fight has been hard. The enemies initial volley of arrows seemed easy enough to dodge. Unscathed, I marched on with confidence, but the next volley... The next volley blanketed the sky with black arrows, tipped in poison and malcontent. They poured down upon me like heavy rains beating against a stone, but like a stone they parted to the wayside for my shield protected me. Still I carried on. The next day, I was too close for the volleys of arrows, so the ground assault began. Waves upon waves of the enemy came upon me. The fight almost seemed to be a relief as it was tangible so I carried on. With the best of my skills I carved my way forward through the wall of opposition, but then... then came the spies. The snipers. Sabotage was among me. My mind filled with mixed thoughts. I waded through the field of confusion like a thick bog growing deeper and deeper, but ... I was still on the path, and that was the goal. Above all else, stay on the path.
After days of fighting, doubt gave way to certainty as the light of truth shined back down upon the battlefield, and I finally was once again able to clearly the see the path before me. Though the fight was long and hard and the enemies many, I had now realized that I had made it even farther than I had hoped.

The first walls have been toppled. I continue, not knowing what lay before me, but that doesn't matter because the path is still at my feat, and I carry on.

Chronicles: I stand (1)

2006-09-08T16:14:00.000-04:00

As with all of the great stories of our time, things are not always as they seem. Behind the wave of victory lies an undertoe. The lull of peace shrouded ever so delicatly by a darkness that somehow prevails. A foe that seems to steal the joy from your soul just when it was begining to feel warmth again.
I stand now, at the turn of a new era. When times have been shadowed by an ever looming evil. When my mortal foe turns out be my very self. When the battles over the years have all seemed to drag on and hope is all but lost, I stand. I regain the will to survive. To thrive. I will not lay down and be washed over by the rising tide. I will stand firm and I will beat it back to the very shores from wence it came. Through sacrifice. Through sweat and tears. Through the nightmares that stand before me upon the battlements, arrows notched and swords drawn. They await me. They have waited a long time for me. They knew I would choose this path eventually, but the path is all they know. The purpose lies hidden to all but me, and that will be their undoing. They stand ready before me, counting my steps. In their minds this is nothing more than a simple act of closure on matter of principle. It had to happen eventually.
Well, it won't happen. It never will.
I stand tall and I carry on. Each step forward bringing me closer to a doom that must be carried out. For whom this doom is meant is many, including myself, but not all doom is bad, atleast as long as I believe.

I stand now ready for battle. I have let go of that which has held me back and held me down. The fight shall be long and hard. Oh how hard this fight shall be. Through day and night, my waking hours will be tested. Even my dreams will be plagued. I will not rest easily for quite some time now, save for the grace of my guardian shall I find any temporary peace in my dreams.
I will fight them all the way back to the wall of their great and dark city and I single handedly will push on through the barred doors of their hall and slay all that stand in my way until I stand face to face with the one man with the power of will to have kept me cowered for so long, and we shall do battle. Standing there, tired and broken from all that have been strown behind me, I will stand with what strength I have left to call forth from the heavans and earth and I will fight. It will be my finest hour, or so I hope. I can not even imagine when this one final battle will end. My eyes have not the power to see that far into a future so shrouded as this.

I wear hope upon my shoulders as armor,
and my will shall be my sword through the fight.
Wisdom shall be my shield that will not sunder,
and love shall be my guiding light.

I know not where this path will end,
but I do know where it leads.
Solace is my only friend,
and only he shall know my deeds.

I have failed so many times before,
but defeat is an ending I will not choose.
Destiny knocks upon my door,
and its calling I can not refuse.

I stand.

oh well

2006-09-07T09:17:00.000-04:00

One of my fish died. T.S. I'm pretty sure Hilter had something to do with it. I bought 2 more fish, Gladys and the Pimp. I'm sure the 3 of them will get along fine.

I won the Lotto!

2006-09-01T11:34:00.000-04:00

Well, actually I just won some cash on a scratch off ticket...

500 smackers!

Those Bastards!

2006-08-25T03:45:00.000-04:00

I just got through watching the anime series .HACK//sign.
All 13 and a half hours of it, (Not consecutively, ofcourse.) and you know what?
I'm pissed.

The cartoon is loosly based on the consept of MMORPGs like EverQuest and this one character somehow slips into a coma in real life and who's conciousness is trapped in the game world and thus unable to log out like the other characters. That's it. Thats all you need to know.
Knowing anything more would be a tease.

The series starts out slow but with the hope of promise. After about 12 hours of boring dialog, flashbacks, and a plot that moves at the speed of Dragon Ball Z, I guess the creators realized that they were running out of money so they sped the storyline up with all the subtlety of a drag race, then two episodes later, brought it all to a crashing halt and slaped a "The End" on it without any since of closure and rolled the credits. So, you sit there staring at the credits saying," WTF? Where's my ending? Thats not an ending! You guys skipped like 3 episodes worth of plot! You BASTARDS!!!"

To put it in context, imagine watching the Lord of the Rings trilogy by skipping the first 30 minutes of the first movie, then watching the second movie twice so you get 3 hours of footage that you have already seen, then watch the 3rd movie up to the point where Frodo is walking into the mouth of MT. Doom (but hasn't gone in yet) then fade to Frodo and all his hobbit buddies clanking mugs back in the shire saying, "That was a great journey", then roll the credits.

That's what the .HACK series is like...
minus the fight scenes...
and heros....
and action...
and plot...
and anything else that could have been considered cool about the Lord of the Rings.

Those Bastards

Its kinda like when you have one of those dreams where your doing work or something stressfull and your stuck in some crappy dream loop where you do the same thing over and over and over until you wake up all stressed out then realize that you now have to actually go to work and do all the stressful crap that you were just dreaming about.

Yeah. Its like that.

I hope the people responsible for .HACK somehow find this post and get their feelings hurt and cry...

than go die...

in a fire.

The straw the broke the camel's back.

2006-08-24T14:45:00.000-04:00

John...
well if you know John, then you'll understand.
He is planning to go on a diet...
again...
soon...
eventualy.

His cat, DeeDee...
Well if you know his cat DeeDee, then you'll understand.
DeeDee is fat. DeeDee is REALLY fat. DeeDee has udders, she is so fat.

John likes to sit in his computer chair. It leans back...
a little...
well a little more each week.
DeeDee likes to sit on John.

I'm sure you've all heard the phrase "The straw that broke the camel's back."
Lets pretend John's computer chair is a camel...
minus the toes.

John is sitting in his chair, leaning back.
DeeDee is positioned across from John on his bed, ready to sit on John.
(At this point the chair is going"Oh God, no no no no no no no!")

DeeDee leaps from the bed onto John's chest. The "momentum" was just enough to break the camel's back.
You see John's eyes light up in confusion as the chair begins to continue leaning backwards when suddenly CRASH! John's feet are in the air, and DeeDee is scurrying away...
well, more like wobbling
hurridly...
about 3 feet...
then stops.

Like a flipped over turtle, I pull John up. The chair, well lets just say it WAS the straw that broke the camels back.
John looks at the broken chair and asks,"What should I do?"
My reply. "Go on a diet."
John decided to try to J-B Weld it today when he gets off of work...
expect another post...
soon...
Eventually.

tough nights.

2006-08-24T01:10:00.000-04:00

I have been experimenting with sleep cycles to see what I could get away with and still be refreshed for work. The good 'ol 8 hours before work tends to be the best but I've tried 4 hours down then do stuff then 4 hours down again. Not as cool but It will do in a pinch. Everything else.....sucks.

2006-08-18T02:31:00.000-04:00

When day is night
and night is day
and only the light from a fish tank
is there to guide your way

With almonds on a table
and water in the fridge.
Fruit in a clothes hamper.
Your hunger is on a bridge.

You pass the time in thoughtless thought
and think of what to do.
Toss and turn in deflated sleep
as hours flow through you.

Grasp your ideas
and plan them now
as you slip
back
into
your
dreams.

Its about that time!

2006-08-13T16:46:00.000-04:00

Get tanked

2006-08-11T13:46:00.000-04:00

The new fish tank is up and running and boy are TS and Hitler happy. Here are some pics.

Hilter chilling at the entrance to bowl #2

TS

Scoping out the grass

The tank

pets

2006-08-11T08:56:00.000-04:00

I don't do pets but.... well, I was walking from the garden center of W*l-M*rt with a couple of air ferns and somehow stopped right at the fish tanks. After staring at the fish for about 10 min I finaly grabbed a cheap fish bowl and netted 2 thumb sized fish. 1 gold fish and 1 kinda like a gold fish that had my attention. They're names are TS (short of Tiger Shark), and Hitler (He has this kickin black mustache that makes him look all "dictative") Alas after staring at them for the past 3 days, they have conviced me to get them a bigger living area than the 1 gallon fish bowl that I originally bought (Hitler can be so convincing) so today I'll head back to the store to shell out 10 bucks or whatever it is for a bigger tank, but to be different, I'm going to put the fishbowl IN the bigger tank so that its like an aquarium IN an aquarium. deep stuff man...really deep.

I'll post pics later.

2006-08-07T16:34:00.000-04:00

getting about that time

2006-08-07T16:16:00.000-04:00

Its getting close to time for sending out reminders about my birthday party but I stioll don't know where to have it. If I can't find a place soon, I may have to cancel, but I really don't want to.

Here it is

2006-08-06T10:50:00.000-04:00

Here is the tote that I finished yesterday. As you can see, it can be used as a backpack or as a purse also.

project 2

2006-08-05T14:09:00.000-04:00

Today, I got a good idea for another knit so I started (and finished) a cool tote that can also be used as a backpack or a purse. I will post some pictures of it soon.

Something to do

2006-08-04T15:24:00.000-04:00

Since I'm starting fresh on a lot of things in my life, I figured I would start a new hobby. It just kinda jumped out at me while I was at the store so I decided to start knitting. I bought a few knitting tools and some yarn yesterday and threw this scarf together last night. I gave it to my friend Billie (pictured) because she was with me when I bought the knitting supplies, and asked if I would knit her something. She enjoys the scarf very much, and ofcourse already has a list of other things she would like to get, which is kinda good because I helps me pick out projects to do and gives me a reason to knit. I'm sure I'll squeeze a few christmas gifts out of this.

The dangley things on the ends are tassles. I said "to hell with instructions" and made my own.

well then

2006-07-29T10:01:00.000-04:00

Now that I'm at a new job that I like, and out of a house that I don't, while being able to save money again, I seem to be living a much less stressful life. The down side is, I have less ammunition for my rantings on this blog.
...
..
....
..
...
Wait a minute...I've still got a few.
Baby... A cat named baby. I wouldn't even call it a cat. Its more like a malnurished cross between a gremlin and a weasel that is always in heat. This damn cat-thing has kinda a sad story behind it. It was found as a kitten in a theater parking lot all cold and wet and a friend took it in and fed it and kept it as a pet. ... Well he should have either had it put down and atleast gotten it fixed for christ's sake. This thing was malnurished as a kitten so even though its fully grown now, it is still small and "frail looking" it...used to lick ALL of its fur off that it could reach and ... well I'll let the picture say the rest. It ALWAYS yells and howls and writhes around either in heat or constantly itching from some skin condition or something. It just will not SHUT UP! Its cute and normal for all of like 2 seconds a week then back to the howling. It hates to be picked up, but its owner loves to pick her up, and then he wonders why she scratches him and darts away. All the other cats hate her because she is just annoying as hell. Everytime I go over there, I make sure she stays closed out of whatever room I'm in so at least the howling is muffled. I know that howl so well that I can immitate it and when I wanna mess with my friend, I start howling and that cat starts right up with me from where ever it is in the house and just starts running around howling about the house... My friend hates it when I do that :)
The devil cat.

My first beer of the day at 9 AM

2006-07-24T09:10:00.000-04:00

Now some of you would think it is kinda odd to start drinking so early but for me its 7PM and my feet hurt so I think I deserve one. I'm gonna have to get some new shoes with better cushoning real soon.

well, its my first night

2006-07-23T22:08:00.000-04:00

first night by myself. shouldn't be a problem, I'm just still kinda tired from not get a completly restful sleep due to.... well let's say "constant conversation" between John and his girl friend.

Yay Me

2006-07-23T12:27:00.000-04:00

I graduated from training today. I am officically an assistant manager with QT. My manager is all cool, too. He's like " I know your new and sometimes isues come up on the overnight shift so basicaly, if something happens short of the pumps exploding, just wait untill the morning shift and left me know then."

Hellz yeah.

Stupid cell phone

2006-07-23T12:25:00.000-04:00

IK always leave my cell phone in my car when I get home and don't realize it untill after I get all dressed down and comfortable, then I'm like,"crap! I gotta go outside in my jammies and get my cell phone."

That was a negative! no wait

2006-07-20T22:58:00.000-04:00

A double negative! NO...Wait......um...I'm confused.

I got one of my chairs out of storage today. Yesterday, I dropped some more stuff off in storage from moving out. At the storage place, the main sign said that there will be an auction of unpaid lots coming soon. Thinking that was kinda funny, I drove around the plce to count all off the "Red Locks." A red lock is placed on your door when you are behind on your payment. There were 30 out of about 300 lots. On a cool note, the owner saw this car driving around the parking lot, scoping out all of the lots so he came outside and asked if I needed any help so he must be really watching those security cameras.

Happy Wriday

2006-07-19T09:27:00.000-04:00

Its Wednesday for you, but it is Friday for me!!!

week 2

2006-07-16T20:24:00.000-04:00

Tonight, I go to my next store. Luckily its still close to home.

um ... yeah....

2006-07-16T09:26:00.000-04:00

ok about the last post.... Lets just say that I was "tired" and wanted to blog about something and the lines just kinda spilled out like ... like... like a "thing" that "spills" on "stuff" wink wink...nudge nudge... ..

..
..

I'm going nowhere with this
why are you even still reading?

Oh yeah. beacuse I wanted to say that blogging during the day isn't as fun now that I'm not being paid to do something else while I am blogging. :p

....

2006-07-15T15:11:00.001-04:00

Its a cup. Its a can. Its a spray.
Its a baby. Arby's on the floor.
I am going to the farmer's market and I am going to buy a live chicken and put it in your room. Crowing in your closet.
Are you getting digital or analog? They can't use the box.
Thats all you need.
The light on my power strip. Red or orange... does it matter?
Lease it for now and we'll see if we can find a good deal.
Double grounded... yeah.
Eat... eat... eat....
It is cold but I want it colder.
I need to take a shower. I feel so hot.
Generic tastes the same, sometimes.
I am bound in unrest. I am about to go on an adventure.
There has to be someone around here that can do it.
Its too far to run.
And your paying 50 bucks a month for that?
My cup is empty.

more photoshop fun

2006-07-14T01:32:00.000-04:00

I know its wrong...but photoshop makes it so easy.

Photoshop fun

2006-07-14T01:25:00.000-04:00

John makes a happy fish.

Its the weekend!!!

2006-07-12T16:46:00.000-04:00

Well, its the weekend for me. 2 wonderful days to screw up my daytime sleeping schedule.

Goliath...Rawwr

2006-07-11T22:14:00.000-04:00

I just ran into Amanda, an old friend of mine online.
Just as I have to get ready for work too. Oh well. Don't forget about my party soon. The address has changed but the crazy stays the same!

Day 1. OK

2006-07-11T11:20:00.000-04:00

My first night went by pretty good. I think I'll get the hang of it all pretty quick.

Cake! yeaaaaayyyyy caaaaake

2006-07-10T22:11:00.000-04:00

Happy B-day Mylerna

off to work

2006-07-10T22:09:00.000-04:00

Well tonight is my first night shift for QT. I'm used to boring and slow, and everything beyond that so I'm sure I'll be fine. I'll update later.

stupid small devices

2006-07-09T11:38:00.000-04:00

Well I moved 98% of my stuff out yesterday. Barry and his gf left sometime in the morning and were gone all day, so when they get back/ got back I'm sure they will think I just tried to skip out without telling them, so I left some crap on the floor in my room so they could assume I was coming back. I took my couch, my chairs and everything out of my room excpet for a few things on the floor... and MY remote for HIS TV. I'm sure he'll love that. The only problem I have though is now I have to go back to the storage place and dig out my battery charger for my cell phone because its dead.